Posts

your cultural hegemony is irrational

I'm still in OMG DISNEY mode, having gotten back from this year's Orlando trip a few days ago. That's fine, but I prefer to be equally balanced between all of my passions. The goal is not to turn down Disney, but rather just to turn everything else up. :)  However, this makes me think yet again of how irrational ideological hegemony is. Take the idea of "you're weird for being a man who does expensive RunDisney races which are dominated by women" which yes, I do experience. No one says it explicitly  but you can feel the side-eye. Never mind that I was 18th place out of over 12,700 people.  That statement has a few underlying assumptions that, when you take them apart, have no actual underlying logic.  Being "weird" is negative (why? weirdness is defined implicitly as deviation from the cultural norm, and what about that is inherently negative?)  what is wrong with doing something that has more women than men in it?  why do I need to be "mascu...
Post a Comment
Read more

Lyrics for 4/14.

One by one, you're all going down I'll make you see! Traveling alone since birth, and I've never felt so liberated - Ghostemane   I really hope he drops a new album when I'm employed again so that way I can get some merch for it. TBD.  Solo traveling tomorrow too, so that last line fits. 
Post a Comment
Read more

Evanescence: Who Will You Follow?

It's an awesome song. I am not the biggest fan of the album cover because it looks like cover art for "Random Fairly Decent YA Paranormal Romance You Picked Up On The Kindle Store For $1.99, Forgot About For A Year, Then Read Randomly After Binging A Kathryn Kingsley Series", aka DEATH AND SOUL OF BLOOD or something But the song is fantastic.  Wearing my bootleg Evanescence wristband from Etsy today in celebration lol because they still won't put an actual wristband on their store.  Also I am pretty sure based on the lyrics that my heavily upvoted Personality Database comment on Amy being a 4w5 is...not correct. There's just too much e6 when she has full lyrical control. Ope.  Excellent music though. 
Post a Comment
Read more

NEVER do a takehome without passing the initial bar

If they like your resume and give you a takehome, sure.  But never do one at the getgo. Not until you're vetted. I broke my rule for QA Wolf and they insta-rejected me anyway. Fuck them. They didn't even watch the stupid Loom recording I spent half a day perfecting.  I'm never doing that again. 
Post a Comment
Read more

weird fitness things

I am probably too chronically online, but I see the weirdest trends in online fitness spaces. Here are a few.  "All that muscle and you still don't know how to FIGHT".  My response: If I was training to be Bruce Lee, I'd sign up for martial arts? I lift because it looks good. I don't understand the argument.  "Hyrox is for bros who don't do manual labor. Shut up and mow your lawn. :) "  My response: I don't like yard work. In fact, I hate it. I'm glad other people like it, and I will pay them to do it for me. What does this even mean? Manual labor is a chore, not a sport. Hyrox is a sport. Once again, I simply do not understand what your argument is.  "Men these days are too WEAK and FEMININE. You need to learn how to eat STEAKS and lift WEIGHTS in a SAUNA. SOFT TIMES CREATE SOFT MEN, STAY HARD"  My response: Okay, so you're either implying that feminine is a bad thing, which is super sketchy and misogynistic , or you're imp...
Post a Comment
Read more

Slept in a bit today

And I think I figured out why yesterday bugged me so much and I wrote that crashout.  One of my most regular writing group members announced he was quitting because he didn't like our submission format. Not hiatus. Quitting. And it's like. We've met weekly since 2020. Six years. Does that not mean anything to you? And now the group is so small they're not sure if they want to keep going. I don't have much of a social life which is normally fine but I've met with these people for SIX. YEARS. How do you just throw it away like it's nothing?  If you love something, you never quit at it. Ever. And so... First off, fuck quitters. Pardon the French. No sympathy. If I'm not important enough to you then fuck you. Second off, this has to mean nothing other than: I will keep writing. I will do my best to keep both my groups running, but if they crash I'll find another. And if that one crashes then fuck them. I will try even harder to make my chapter cadence in...
Post a Comment
Read more

and then it all comes crashing down

I've been laid off from every full-time job I've had.  Including my dream job that I got during an industry boom and foolishly thought I'd stay at forever.  One of my writing groups is on the verge of collapse and I feel it's partly my fault because I wasn't submitting consistently enough. That's what triggered this I guess.  No relationships. No romance.  No novels published. I was THE gifted English kid and I've done nothing No Patreon. No art commissions. My art is still mediocre, both 2D and 3D. Same with my graphics programming. No way animation would hire me for anything beyond pipeline.  Didn't double major with mechanical or electrical engineering and am too far behind on my self-study.  I'm not very good at Leetcode. I'm not very good at system design. I don't have any cool apps on the store. Nobody cares about SWEs anymore. All they care about business and vibe coding.  I got an Adobe internship and I can't get back in. I've...
Post a Comment
Read more