Learning to embrace a bit of hunger

No, not starving yourself lol. 

But I've been implementing a caloric deficit. If I work out more, I get to eat more, but I need to consistently be in a deficit. The nice thing is that I burn so many calories on Saturdays that I can eat a lot of food and still be in a deficit. 

During the week though, holy crap. 25 minutes of lifting and 3.25 miles of running per day is pretty much what I can fit in from Monday through Friday. Then I've got 2 midday walks, usually 10-15 minutes each. Hopefully I'll increase that, but for now I'm eating around 2300 calories per day. It's a lot, but I used to eat like 3000 calories a day, and then I dropped to around 2500-2600, and now 2300ish. 

I cut it from dinner and snacks. Dinner is good because I just eat a moderate amount, and then I pass out. So if I wake up at 3 am absolutely ravenous, my tiredness overwhelms the hunger and I just drink some water and go back to sleep. I eat a lot at breakfast and lunch. But I'm down to maybe 1 piece of chocolate per day, sometimes 2. And my dinners are smaller. I only drink shakes on Saturdays and I keep them small (unless I'm going to Iceberg) and the only time I ever really drink soda is 1) on really hot days at Lagoon during the summer, 2) after extremely long hikes (like 15+ miles), and 3) I guess during Thanksgiving. So this is not super often, especially now that it's fall and cooler outside. 

And it's working. I have dropped from 170-172 pounds to 166. Need to get down to 150-155. I don't care too much about building muscle right now. I just want to be toned. You do a reasonable amount of ab work with a low enough body fat percentage and you'll see abs. 

I'm also hungry a lot. This is how I was in high school, I felt like I always wanted to eat. And when I did, it was magnificent. But I would always drink water and pause after 1-2 helpings of food. 

I'll never eat as little as I did in high school. If I had been closer to 120-130 lb. instead of 100 with my entire ribcage visible, I think I would've been a better runner. But being in the high 160s / low 170s, with a round face and love handles, is just not it. 

I use lazy IIFYM. Tracking food with Cronometer and my workouts with my Apple Watch. I can eat whatever I want, just not however much I want, and I try to get a decent amount of protein. I'm trying to not go TOO crazy with the carbs, but eh, who cares lol. I don't care about vegetables, they are gross and I am not going to eat them. Except for fake ones like Harvest Snaps or the plastic ones in Panda Express fried rice. Oh and I only get the 1-item from Panda now.

Crystal Light Energy gives me the power I need to move through the day. Basically zero sugar, a reasonable amount of caffeine, and it's just a drink mix for water. I skip it on Fridays and Sundays to calm down my adenosine receptors and just deal with the headache. I take double doses (120 mg caffeine instead of 60 mg) on Thursdays and Saturdays. 

But holy CRAP I am hungry. 

A reasonable amount of hunger is simply the sound of your fat crying as it gets burned. It's annoying though and I suspect my writing is going to start including Brian Jacques levels of food descriptions again. 

"and in this short life, there's no time to waste on giving up." - Evanescence 

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