balancing school, work, AND art / stream of consciousness

Haven't found an article yet that talks about balancing all three. I've always had to balance all 3. Technically, studying CS Animation meant that I was also an art student (but barely, because the program is heavily weighted in favor of coding), and also, I'm a TD in the animation industry -- so maybe I've already made it. But I want to create beautiful illustrations and animations on my own. I have the coding and art skills required to build pipeline tools, code graphics applications, and troubleshoot artist issues. But when I create my own art? It's fine. It's not bad. But it needs to be good. And well, when I try to draw people, I have to say that it is probably more on the side of bad, lol. 

I feel like I'll be an even better TD if I am on a skill level closer to that of the artists. I don't have to be there, but I need to be close -- of course, I want to get all the way there lol. 

And then I also have writing and music, plus trying to nail math for the whole graphics programming thing. 

Beginning of November is always super depressing to me. I hate November 1st because everything I love shuts down, like immediately after Halloween is over. Like I think a few of the more extreme haunted houses are still open but I'm a bit too much of a pansy for those. I'll stick to Frightmares and the Haunted Forest, thanks. I don't want to be dragged around by some dude through a dark room where I can't see anything. That is just too different from the fun of roller coasters, dark rides, and water slides. It's a bit too visceral, interactive, and real. No thank you. 

Lagoon is closed, Wilkerson Farm is closed (they were going to be open for an extra week, but for some reason, they decided not to...like they do every year). Water parks have been closed for months. Ricochet Canyon is closed. No more carnivals or fairs. All that's left are indoor water slides at rec centers, and possibly that one Ferris wheel at Scheel's (is that even still operating?). I do love the Halloween season, but after that, it feels like the gates of happiness are shut directly in my face. 

I want to move away from Utah and the cold, the ice, the snow, the social conservatism, the super young and rushed marriages where the only single people my age are divorced (and got divorced at like 23). I used to think I would find love here, but it's now blatantly obvious that I won't, because everyone is already married, so I'm leaving. And that means I need to get this MS thesis done. And damn it I really want to make my art take off. But that isn't going to happen on 20 minutes per day of practicing, yet it's hard to do even that when you're working 40h, doing school, working on a novel that you also don't have time for, trying to stop sucking at clarinet/piano, and attempting to drop some pounds. 

It'll happen, though. I'll figure it out like I always have. It's a tall order for this winter. 206 days until Memorial Day weekend. I have a lot to do before then in order to enhance my skills and finish my degree, and I need to ramp up my pace. 

Let's do this. I want a relaxing yet productive summer -- and I don't want all this crap hanging over my head anymore. 

Instagram is also getting super aggressive with their push notifications and I'm going to turn them off. 

Anyway, time to get to it. Nothing fun happens during winter anyway except Christmas. Git gud. Work harder than you ever have in your life.