So yeah Lagoon a Beach

I'm in Lagoon mode now it seems. 

I was reading a pretty decent Lagoon tips blog post at breakfast. I am trying to find stuff that I don't know or that is at least better than "Wear sunscreen!" Like no duh Jan of course we should be wearing sunscreen 😭 It gave me more ideas for tips. 

You know what you need when entering LAB? A portable locker. 

Yes, the Lockpicking Lawyer can open all of those in less than 5 minutes. However, you are not the Lockpicking Lawyer, and neither is anyone else at the water park. I learned how to pick master locks in my Pentesting course at the Y but I'm not gonna practice at a water park. 

That way you save $8 or $10 or however much the lockers cost. I can't remember. I haven't paid for one in years. ...also...who is going to go down a speed slide with one of those waterproof pouches holding a phone? I'm certainly not. I'm already holding my shoes. Because yes, to the amazement of small children everywhere (who always comment on my shoes for some reason, it is mildly amusing), I am going to wear dorky looking water shoes to a water park. Otherwise you risk having lots of fun new experiences like getting MRSA. I don't like surprises. 

I usually book it to the deck above the lagoon itself as soon as they let us in. It is the ideal location because you have a great view of both the lagoon and the water park. I grab a chair, chain my locker to it, take off my shirt and stow it, put my towel on top of everything with my tennis shoes to anchor it, then immediately head towards the speed slides. The speed and serpentine slides will have the worst lines on summer Saturdays so they must be tackled ASAP. Seriously, it's the difference between 30 minutes and 2 hours to ride these towers, with: 2 speed slides, and 4 serpentine slides if they're all running (and I haven't figured out which one jacks up my swimsuits yet -- but one of them does). 

Then after that -- THEN tackle the Twist and Shout tower. That's 4 more slides, again assuming they are all running. 

Then Outrigger. Even if the line goes all the way down to the bottom of the stairs, the loading is lightning quick and the wait should be less than 10 minutes. Yes, even at 2:30 pm on a July Saturday. You will want to engage your core on this one. Otherwise you are getting dunked into the splash pool every time you hit one. 

Then lazy river + blue lagoon. 

After that, lunch :) 

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